Saturday, April 16, 2011

Lingua Franca

The exam season had arrived along with the festival of light. What a confluence of events. Whether to devour the array of sweets in the palate or imbibe few more words into my biological CPU was the question I was asking myself. My insatiable gourmet desire emerged as the final winner. While I was lavishing on those sweets a question had risen in my mind. Why are people who aspire to enter the top colleges in India being tested for their ability in English? Doesn’t make any sense! Not that I am educated but even to a neophyte this would sound a little weird.

So much importance given to a language, which was derived from Greek, Latin and many other languages. I started to wonder if institutes in China, Korea, Italy, France etc were also following the same practice. Out of curiosity I did a search in the internet and found out that the majority of them don’t even use English as a medium to teach.

There is a process of factionalism happening in urban India, people who know to speak English and people who don’t. I recently came across an article in “The Hindu” wherein a school was imposing exorbitant fine on students who weren’t communicating in English. In fact this was the same situation in my school when I was studying. And am sure this would be the same across many schools in India. Kids get chastised for talking in their mother-tongue. At such a tender age this practice might develop a sense of aversion towards their mother-tongue. I had an aversion when I was callow. I used to feel chagrin whenever I told people that so and so language was my mother-tongue.

People look at others superciliously when they don’t use English at workplaces, schools, colleges, restaurants, family congregations etc. Pity the souls who find it difficult to converse eloquently in English because they’ll have to deal with disparity wherever they go. A sense of inferiority complex develops within them and they start questioning their own potential. They are pushed to the so called tier-2 status in the society.

Families are slowly shifting towards using English permanently at home. Parents want their off-springs to use only English and they are ready to go to any extent to implement this. Students who come from a rural background and non-English medium background find it difficult and even thwarting to face their competitors in cities.

We’ve gone to the summit of credulousness that English is now revered as a token of knowledge and not just another language. We’ve started believing that it is not just another tool to communicate but a tool to stamp our ascendancy on the ingenuous. Youths have started to feel abashed to use their mother-tongue in front of strangers for the fear that he might think him to be archaic and take him for granted. Higher officials in organizations have started to circumspect the ability of an employee who doesn’t know or who has minimal fluency in English. Whenever we meet a doctor, a lawyer or any bureaucrat we try to stick to English.

It’s so bemusing to understand why people feel at ease to interpret something in a language which is not aboriginal to them. Won’t it be even better if the same is done with our own mother-tongue? Not to take away any respect from the beautiful language of the Shakespeare’s and the Milton’s, but we’ve our own stalwarts like Khalidas, Valmiki, and Thiruvalluvar to name a few. Am not saying that we should start using only Sanskrit and chaste Tamil but we at least can try not to hide the fact that our mother-tongue is Hindi or Tamil or Kannada et al which have their origins long before English even saw its infancy. We needn’t force our kids to use their mother-tongue, but we can at least try to stop them from feeling that using one’s mother-tongue is an act of shame. English is a universal language but it’s not the only language of the knowledgeable and the intellectuals. Let us try not to belittle our mother-tongue each one of which has a rich history behind it.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

My Dream

Am going to narrate a dream my school mates will understand this better than anyone else

Saraswati mam was distributing Hindi papers. One by one people where collecting their paper. Maddy, Faheem, Janakiraman and my roll number was in some sequence. First Janaki was called. As usual he was giggling and went to collect the paper. To give a brief idea about how this guy looks, if you have ever been to some IIT and come across a nerd with long hair and shabby clothes, well you have nailed the appearance of Janaki. Mam caught hold of his giridha and told "ithukku onnum korachal illa ana mark thaan valarave matinguthu Nee lam ethuku schoolukku variyo" (There is no shortage of hair, it keeps growing for you, but the mark doesn’t grow a bit. Why do you come to the school?). She threw the paper on his face. He got back smiling at me and Faheem. I was curious to know his marks because Hindi was the only subject in which i got beaten every time.

While i was scrutinizing his paper Faheem’s name was called out. That guy was so tensed and he approached towards Mam. Mam was wearing typical school teacher attire to go with her spectacles. She was turning the papers and her spectacle was on the tip of her nose. Faheem announced his arrival with a contrite cough. Mam saw the slender figure superciliously. She asked Faheem "How much do you think you have got?"(This conversation was in Hindi and as am poor in our national language am interpreting it in the universal language). Faheem replied "Maybe 70 mam". She started admonishing him and handed the paper. Faheem was wondering what happened. He understood the reason for her weird behavior when he saw the marks. Poor guy missed the pass mark by 3. His face turned red. Meanwhile Janaki and I was laughing at Faheem as he walked towards our bench. We were so happy that he was scolded in front of everyone. I Am twisting the famous dialogue from the movie 3 Idiots “You become sad when you get low marks but you become double happy when your close friends get lower marks”. As he sat down and leaned on the table i snatched the paper from him to check out his marks. We, Janaki and I, were literally tearing apart the paper to look at his score. Finally I assented to him seeing it. A loud burst broke the silence in the class room. Our dear Janaki was euphoric as soon as he saw Faheem’s marks. He conveyed the same to me and I became anxious. When Faheem, who in my opinion was very good in Hindi, flunked what will my result be? I wasn't willing to participate in his joy. My hands and feet became cold. My number was next and I almost stood to walk towards Mam. Instead of my number Maddy’s number was called out. I was kind of abashed because almost everyone in the class saw me stand up and amble towards Mam. I had to take a corner seat in another row temporarily. I avoided eye contact with others and acted as if i was enquiring my friends mark.

Maddy was nervous. I always used to wonder why a guy, who always tops the class and was the favorite of the masses become so tensed when it is so clear that he is going to top again no matter how much others try to bring him down from No 1 rank. Anyways, his fair face became red as he was inches away from grasping his paper. Mam announced that he was the top scorer again and she even chastised us by telling that all others are unfit and had to learn from him. I wasn't able to hear anything and it was as if i became deaf momentarily because I knew I was next. Just before the exams started I had challenged someone that i will get better rank than him in that exam and Hindi was my weakest point. I started aggregating my marks in other subjects whose papers were already given. I was 10 or 12 marks ahead of that adversary. I think it was Krishna with whom I had the challenge. Minutes of waiting were like years. Finally my number was called.

As i nimbly walked the pictures of me writing the exam passed in front of my eyes. I knew i had screwed it. I knew i hadn't prepared well. I hated that subject so much. I stood next to her and she gave me a look. The look personified everything. It told me that am an utter waste, a nuisance to the class. Her look was so disparaging and i didn’t have the guts to see her in eyes. I put my head down and was gearing up for the ride, ride which i didn’t want to happen in front of the class, in front of the girls. She handed the paper to me and shouted at the top her voice. The decibel level was in such a scale that i was sure that even people playing in the ground could hear the grunt. I started shivering. Even though i was weak in Hindi i hadn't failed even once. My worst nightmare was staring in front of my eyes. She started the rhetoric.
I heard nothing. All I wanted was to get the paper and check my marks because I knew Tamil papers were also being distributed simultaneously in a different class. People were laughing at me as i walked towards my bench. Faheem was still lying on the table with his head down I could hear that he was crying. I seated myself comfortably and opened the paper. At that very moment I could see the sky was beginning to turn red. I sensed that people at home had risen from their sleep. I was in a state of semi-coma, a term which i coined now. A state which everyone feels when they're about to wake up early in the morning. I didn’t know if I was awake or still in the dream. I wanted to know the end of my dream so I voluntarily shut down my eyes. I started to concentrate on my sleep. It was like a T.V when you have a dish connection and it is raining heavily. The screen was flickering and I had to fine tune it to get the motion picture running flawlessly in my mind. I knew that I had only a little time before I entered the real world.

Finally there I was holding the paper and addled why everyone was laughing like someone was dancing nude. I slowly opened my paper. Tragedy, in fact it was a heart break for a teacher who teaches Hindi. My paper didn’t have a letter in Hindi. I had written the entire exam in English. My god what had happened to me. Seeing the paper I couldn't but give a smile in the real world. I slowly got down from the bed and saw my reflection in a mirror thanking God that nothing like that had happened when I was in school.

Still I feel that a dream is better than a movie. A movie will just give you a vicarious experience but in a dream you live the character. No wonder why Christopher Nolan took a movie like Inception.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Tribute to a Master

The street was not filled with people. We all know that there is some difference between each of the 6 billion odd people walking on this earth. And that’s the reason why we call ourselves as humans. Human literally means - “Relating to a person”. But the street wasn’t filled with humans. There must’ve been some two to three thousand creatures out there. The entire crowd was doing the same thing. It was feeling the same joy and shouting the same slogan. When a creature does the same thing again and again repeatedly you usually don’t tag them as humans. I was standing in the middle and witnessing all these. The usually cool breeze from the sea was carrying something else along with it. Philosophically speaking when you’re full of happiness or for that matter sadness it not only gets rubbed on your closed ones but also on your surroundings. In an urban jungle like this our mood shifts affects the materials and non-living things around us. For example you would’ve been in a situation where you’re in a bad mood and your bike, which is usually impeccable, doesn’t start. So just imagine the joy of 2000-3000 people plus that of another 1 billion travelling through the air and you’re able to feel the entire thing. If you have read “The Alchemist” you will get an idea what am trying to explain.


I don’t think anyone would’ve been sad that night. Even a new born kid would’ve felt that “Ok am born on some special day”. What was this all about? In childhood you would’ve listened to your Grandma tell that Sages undergo penance for 4 or 5 years to get the blessings of the almighty. But here a person who is almost equivalent to an almighty has undergone penance for 20 years to make a population of about 1.15 billion blessed. How is it possible to make such a huge crowd think alike? Politicians would do anything to know this secret. How will Sachin be feeling? What would be running in his mind? Who cares because he is running in all our minds.


What blessed soul he is. I don’t think even a reincarnation of Lord Vishnu would make people this much happy. I don’t think if Jesus was born today he would have had a following like this. The difference between the Gods I told and Sachin is , Sachin doesn’t meet anyone in person, he doesn’t ask people to follow him or his words, he doesn’t advice people, he doesn’t preach or he hasn’t written any book of conduct. But still we are oblivious to everything when he is on the crease. We don’t need his word for an advice; we just need his presence on the field. We don’t expect him to come and meet everyone; we just need a glimpse of him. Why is this happening to us? Does he mesmerize us with some black magic? LOL again who cares. We don’t need any explanation to it. What can you tell when my 5 year old nephew keeps shouting “SACHINNNNN SACHINNNN” when he sees him on screen? How can you explain this? It simply doesn’t have any answer. The kid neither would know anything about the game nor it would be possible to influence its mind, but still he knows who Sachin is and what he means to the entire nation.


In this world its not possible that everyone will be talented and will be able to achieve something and become famous. Its not possible that everyone will be blessed to be happy always. And its not possible that everyone will be blessed to witness something special. Our fore fathers were blessed in the era of Independence struggle as they witnessed a nation getting its birth. That was a celebration which was just for a day or to the maximum a week. But we are blessed to be in a generation where a 5 foot 5 inches maestro was living and breathing his game. Our blessing is not for a day or a week, its been for 20 years and it will continue. We love you Sachin – Tears 

Thursday, March 31, 2011

30th March,2011 - Day of a lifetime

It was 5o'clock in the morning and as usual i got up cursing my office bus timings. My head was heavy from the dreams the previous night, dreams which am sure i shared with another 1155347678 people. Images were crossing in front of my eyes when i was having my shower, images of the past failures and a possible future brilliance. I was reminded of footages of a God born on 24th of April. Fine i had to forget all those things and run to catch my bus.

I wasn't shocked to see the roads empty. It was obviously an un-official govt holiday. I was sad, sadder than when my love was rejected, because my Project Lead was apprehensive in giving me half a day off. But i was determined to escape somehow. Confidence, which has been my only savior till now, was always smiling at me. You know these IT employees; even though 95% of them don't have any work to do they act as if they're the backbone of the company. You ask anyone in IT , he/she will tell "I don't have time to even breathe!!!". And these people when they're with their team members will be like his/her team is the world to them , but as soon as you separate them and ask about one of his team members, its better you carry two pieces of cotton with you . Ok here i was doing my act like all other IT professionals. My lead came around his usual timing and i timidly went to him to ask for permission again. I was feeling as if i was at a cliff and about to jump from Mt Everest without any harness. What if he says I can't leave? What if i miss 70% of the action? The moment came and i could feel the words travelling in air at 340m/s from my mouth. My vocal cords made voices which i havent heard my entire life. 340m/s is quite fast when you consider that scientists struggled for years to crack that barrier. You would've felt the Theory of relativity many a times in your life, for instance when you were waiting to see your board exam results or when you had proposed to a girl and waiting for her reply , but this case was completely new to me. I was waiting for the words to travel a distance of hardly 1 meter and having said the speed of sound you can do the math to understand how long it would take for my words to enter the labyrinth of my listener. It was a long wait . But once my listener got the question he told just one word . The word which we take for granted and use it at a frequency almost equivalent to our breathing "OK". I was damn happy.

Finished whatever work i had before 12:30 IST and got back home exactly at 2:12 IST. Just in time for the toss, the National Anthem and the Goose bumps. I have watched many matches with my frenz and have felt the adrenaline, but this was something special. Among the audience in the stands where one of the most influential women in the world with her son, two of the most powerful leaders in the world with their diplomacies and almost 25000 other lucky people whose lifetime would get fulfilled by that single day. The captains where out in the middle for the toss. Dhoni won it and the crowd was shouting as if India had won the world cup. Dhoni uttered one name and am sure 1 billion people would've started cursing him "NEHRA". I was continuously yelling the 4 letter word in front of my parents to their embarrassment. Then came the National Anthem. The sweetest National Anthem i have ever sung. Wherever i had hairs on my body they stood upright (Guys will understand this lol). My face turned red with pride. Here we were in the middle of a modern war singing our National Anthem. Am sure almost the whole of India would've sung at that time. Then came the music from the Mozzart of Madras. The hairs on my body where complaining saying that they can't rise more than that , but still my adrenaline was pushing them further.

The match started and it was blitzkreig from Sehwag. Am not gonna narrate the entire match now . But people who watched it would have discovered one thing for sure "Even Gods have many lives like Cats". There are three things which haven't changed in Pak "Terrorism, beautiful women and dropping catches" . Even if the cricket ball was changed with football i don't think they would catch it. Something which we should all be thankful to. Our innings got over and we got a modest total. Remember two players whose mom and sister would've been the most scolded souls in the recent past where about to bowl now "MUNAF and NEHRA". When your in a tense situation you transfer that tension to the atmosphere around you in the form of heat and the whole place starts to feel like a furnace. I was in a furnace like that. It was down to the last 5 overs. Pak had to get 60-70 odd runs and India 1 wicket. Zak lost his cool and gave away runs in the first over of the powerplay. It was poor Nehra's turn the next over. Images of Pietersen lofting this guy over mid-wicket were in front of my eyes. What is he gonna do now? He answered my question with 5 yorkers and a well directed bouncer. Over of his lifetime and saved his mom n sis from another round of swearing. Munaf followed the footsteps of Nehra and bowled another GEM of an over. We won it eventually. How the guys would have felt? Have we ever felt something like that? What would Sachin be thinking? Is this a dream? How can you explain this - A man who is revered as GOD, who has all the records under his sleeves except for the WC,who has played in 6 editions of the WC and still hasnt won it , who is playing in probably his last world cup, for whom an entire nation is praying ; is about to play the finals at his home ground in probably his last WC match and is just one short of 100 centuries !!!! Is this what you call coincidence ?? Or is it DESTINY ?? Or is it something divine , something unexplainable ?? How can you explain this ?? I leave this question to all the readers of this mail . I doubt if Atheists will be able to explain this.